Ordinary life
So what is Success? and how do you define it? According to the Oxford dictionary, Success is the fact that you have achieved something you want and have been trying to do or get.
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A guide to ordinary life: Chapter I

Rule 1 : Your Success is defined by you and only you

However difficult life may seem, there is always something you can do and succeed at.

                            Stephen Hawking

Buying a house or a car. Getting married, having children, finding a job, creating your own business, passing your exams and so on, could define the idea of success for someone.

You see each of us as human being have been defining success differently for century. For example, if my idea of success was to become a published author, being able to buy a house  or a car will be a nice reward  but those actions will not be considered  as my ultimate success but for someone else they could be. 

So what is Success? and how do you define it?

According to the Oxford dictionary, Success is the fact that you have achieved something you want and have been trying to do or get.

Once a versatile notion , the notion of success, in our modern days has slowly seen its definition diverted to enclose just two things which are how wealthy you are or how powerful you have become.

In a short period of time, we have moved from an individual definition of success to a collective one.

 There is not anymore this individual distinction of what we call our success. You have to be rich and powerful to be considered a success or die trying.

Also on the other hand, our success has become more than before  the fulfilment of someone else dreams or our society idea of accomplishment.

How many of us have obtained a good and respectable position in the workplace not because it was our dream job but because it was a reasonable thing to do and it has made our parents really proud? I am sure many of us have done just that.

So if according to popular belief, success is defined by how powerful and wealthy you are, are you then a failure to just want to get the job that you have always wanted to do even if it does not bring you the wealth and power that our society deems to be relevant?

Are you considering yourself a failure if your dream is just to become a stay at home mum and take care of your family?

If your answer is no, you  understand what I mean by the fact that the notion of success should be defined by you and only you.

We are all different with different personalities, different ambitions, different needs and living our life according to someone else precept is to not live our life at all.

People nowadays think that by earning a certain amount of living like they have been told everyday of their life, will make them special or extraordinary. They will then be considered a success because they have achieved what society has deemed as essential to be somebody.

But they forget that becoming all those things will only make them lose their uniqueness. They will and still be someone idea of success.

Every living being in this planet earns a living but they do make that something special, they just know they have to do it to maintain their ecosystem. 

Have you ever seen ants comparing themselves to lions? No because the existence of the lion does not come into account when it is working on earning a living for itself and its society.

We, humans,are the only living being who compares ourselves to one another.

Gore Vidal summarise it perfectly in his quote :” Every time a friend succeed I die a little”.

We need to move on from this continual comparison mentality we have developed.

Next time your parents told you about the son or the daughter of one of their friends that is getting married or having a child, just let them know that you are not them and that maybe the idea of getting married or having a child, it is your idea of hell on Earth. 

We are not special or extraordinary but we are unique ordinary beings with a unique  dream. 

I would like to conclude  this first chapter of the Guide to Ordinary life with a quote from Yogi Sadhguru and hope that this short window about this notion of success will make you realise that you may have already reached your own success but still comparing yourself to someone else which makes you unable to enjoy it.

Don’t be a slave to another person idea, and that will be your success.

                                Sadhguru